Friday, 10 June 2011


Part of a work in progress. Imagine what follows as a voiceover, a female voice, closeup on blindfolded face, mouth, lips... maybe in the background there's some very blurred action going on, candlelit, in what appears to be a fetish club or dungeon. Maybe the voiceover is interrupted at various points by the sound of a flogger, or moans from an unseen third party...

At some point I may actually get around to filming this as a piece of Nu Fetish... I have a couple of other ongoing projects to finish first, though. Well, about six other projects to finish first...


Then he tied my hands behind my back and put a blindfold on me. If you want me to play with you, he said, you’ll have to say exactly what your fantasy is – what you want me to do with you. You’ll have to ask me to do those things. Beg me. And then my mind went blank. I don’t know what I was expecting.

I don’t even know if he’s still here. Is he recording me? Filming me, so he can play it back later for reference? For evidence? For entertainment? I’m on my knees. Being on my knees makes me think I should open my mouth. Receive his cock. Suck him off. I hope I’ll be sucking him off. I’ll have to ask if I want to suck him off. But do I want to suck him off before he beats me? Is it a privilege I should earn by taking a whipping?


How can I ask to be transported, taken to another world? The things I want him to do – they’re just the ways to get there, to get into a different headspace.

I guess I want him to squeeze my nipples, beat me, bite my neck… He’ll ask, beat me how, and where. Breasts? Back? Ass? Cunt? All of them. With what? I don’t know. I want it to hurt. I want bruises to keep me warm. I want him to make me silent. I want him to make me scream. I want choices taken away from me. I want a gag. I want him to crush ice against my tortured, red skin.

I want to know it’s real. I want to see the video. I want to see me saying these things, asking, begging, while he squeezes and bites and whips me. I want to be inside and outside my own skin at the same time, seeing everything, feeling everything, until wanting anything is insubstantial and the pain is a furious dark euphoria.


PS - see what Wordle made of this text in terms of word-image over at my DeliciouslyDeviant blog.


  1. Lyrical, very visual and beautifully written!

  2. Thank you!

    I have a similar piece I've been playing with as well that I thought would work well as a movie file, but I started it off in PowerPoint and it turned out to be a pain in the ass. I think I may need to transfer the whole thing over to Keynote (since I'm on a Mac) as it seems to offer better possibilities for matching up audio and slideshow and then exporting it to a movie format...